The People You Surround Yourself With Matter More Than You Think: How to Level Up By Choosing the Right Circle

You’ve probably heard the quote: “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” And while it may sound like another cliché, it’s one of the truest statements I’ve come to learn through both personal experience and coaching high-achieving women.

If you’re feeling stuck, constantly drained, or like you’re doing all the right things but still not moving forward… it’s time to look around you.

Who are you spending your time with?
What kind of energy are they bringing into your life?
Are they fueling your vision—or feeding your doubts?

Your Circle Can Be Your Catalyst—or Your Cage

Here’s what I see all the time: Women with massive potential, a fire in their soul, and a strong desire to grow—yet they’re surrounded by people who keep them small.

Sometimes it’s subtle. A friend who always plays it safe and discourages you from “taking on too much.” A partner who questions your goals. A family member who doesn’t understand your need for self-investment or time away to work on your dream.

And sometimes it’s more obvious. The friend who makes little digs about your success. The circle that only bonds over gossip or negativity. The business acquaintance who’s always complaining but never taking action.

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Many high achievers struggle with this quiet form of sabotage.

But here’s the hard truth:
You can’t level up if you’re constantly being pulled down.

Why It Matters: Your Environment Shapes Your Identity

Research shows that our behavior, mindset, and even self-esteem are influenced by the people we’re around most frequently. If your inner circle is unmotivated, pessimistic, or stuck in a victim mindset, you’ll absorb that energy—even if you're trying not to.

On the flip side, being around people who dream big, take action, and lead with integrity has a way of elevating you. Their habits become contagious. Their energy reminds you of what’s possible. Their feedback challenges you to think bigger, act braver, and believe in yourself more.

You start to rise… because they expect you to.

Pain Points from the Wrong Circle

• You feel unseen or misunderstood. You crave deep connection, but your current relationships feel surface-level or transactional.

• You feel guilty for wanting more. Like your desire for growth makes you “too much” or “too ambitious.”

• You’re constantly the most motivated one. You’re always pouring into others but getting nothing back.

• You shrink your dreams. You stop sharing what you really want because you fear judgment or lack of support.

Sound familiar?

What Level-Up Support Looks Like

Now, imagine the opposite:

• People who celebrate your wins without comparison.

• Friends who ask how your business or personal growth is going—not just about work gossip or weekend plans.

• Mentors who offer perspective, not just praise.

• Relationships built on truth, accountability, and shared values.

These are the people who help you expand.
Not because they push you hard—but because they believe in you even when you don’t believe in yourself.

How to Audit and Elevate Your Circle

1. Take Inventory. Write down the 5 people you spend the most time with. Are they aligned with the version of yourself you’re trying to become?

2. Get Honest. Do they support your growth or drain your energy? This isn’t about blaming anyone—it’s about being intentional with your space.

3. Seek Out Expanders. Join a mastermind. Hire a coach. Attend networking events or women’s circles that attract others on a similar journey.

4. Be the Energy You Want to Attract. Show up with integrity. Celebrate others. Lead by example. Like attracts like.

You’re Not Meant to Do This Alone

You weren’t meant to carry the weight of your goals alone. You need people who get it. Who speak your language. Who hold you to your highest.

So if you’ve been feeling stuck, unmotivated, or like you’re living a life smaller than what you’re capable of—it might not be your habits. It might be your environment.

Choose people who expand your vision, not limit it.
Choose people who water your growth, not question it.
Choose people who see you—the real, ambitious, soulful, powerful you.

Want to surround yourself with women who are also committed to their next level?
Book a call below with me and let’s talk about what’s possible when you finally have the right support, structure, and community to elevate.

Let this be your season of aligned connection—and unstoppable growth.